Sermon Notes: HER TURN!

Series:  KIKI, DO YOU LOVE ME?

  HER TURN!

I Corinthians 13

Introduction

The “Kiki, Do You Love Me?” series continues today.  As discussed previously, Scripture says that the husband should love his wife, and the wife should honor her husband.  Similarly, some psychologists suggest that men communicate and process through their egos; while women communicate and process through their emotions.  So: man –> honor –> ego; woman –> love –> emotion.

If you want to motivate and communicate with a man effectively, then it behooves you to be “ego smart.”   If you want to motivate and communicate with a woman effectively, then it behooves you to be “emotions smart.”  This principle also applies to same-sex communication dynamics, not just dating and marriage relationships!

In John 21:17, Jesus said: If you love me, feed my sheep.   Jesus knew sheep needed food.  Similarly, the Spirit also knows that men need to be honored, and women need to be loved!

When this message is over, we will, among other things: know what that love looks like; know how to communicate with – and love – the appropriate women in our lives; and men will know how to love the appropriate women in their lives more powerfully.

“Women think of love as taking trouble for others…Men tend to think of love as not giving trouble to others.”

~ C.S. Lewis .                       

A REVELATION — EPHESIANS 5:25                                    

1. 1. Women were powerless and, as a result, vulnerable.
   2. Men were “commanded” to love their wives. The idea of loving your wife was unbelievably radical.
   3. Undoubtedly, men viewed this “love commandment” as utterly ridiculous, a crackpot notion.
   4. Husbands were asked to express sexual love (eros); affectionate love (phileo); and sacrificial love (agape).

A REVOLUTION — ROMANS 5:8

1. 1. 1. Husbands cannot duplicate Jesus’ love, but husbands can imitate Jesus’ love.
      2. Sacrificial love requires you to relinquish your position of power in order to put the needs of the wife first!
      3. In Ephesians 5, husbands were not being asked to lead their wives but told how to serve their wives!  Lead by serving!
      4. Wives are supposed to be loved (served) into submission by their husbands, not manipulated or cajoled.

A RELATIVITY

A.  Men

• Food
• Working stuff
• Civility
• Bills covered
• Sex/lovemaking

B.  Women

• I Peter 3:7a ¾  Be closely aligned with your wife.
• I Peter 3:7a ¾  Be interested in her interests.
• I Peter  3:7b ¾Be knowledgeable of your wife.
• I Peter  3:7c ¾ Be appreciative of your wife.

C.  The Rooms in a House Analogy

• Men
• Bathroom
• Kitchen
• Bedroom
• Women
• Bathroom
• Living Room
• Kitchen
• Dining Room
• Bedroom
• Family Room
• Guest Bedrooms

D.  Some theologians and psychologists suggest: you can respect someone you don’t love, but you cannot love someone you don’t respect. BUT, (some) women can naturally love men they do not honor (or respect).

A WRAP — HEBREWS 10:24

1. 1. Develop and implement strategies that will stir up the love within the appropriate women in your life!
   2. Develop and implement strategies that will stir up good works within the appropriate women in your life!

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